Monday, March 11, 2013

An Unexpected Beauty

It's Doctor Season right now. Every six months, all of Collin's specialists want to see him in their respective offices. This results in a roughly six week period during which we have anywhere from one to three extra appointments a week. In the beginning, this was an extremely stressful time. Every appointment loomed large and uncertain. It felt as though we left nearly every appointment with something new to worry about.

Now, it's still a stressful time, but mostly because of the rigor of Collin's schedule and the physical strain of getting him to appointments and back, with all of the potty-times-in-the-van that go along with them. Appointments now are more lead by us - we update the doctors, giving them our insights. We hardly ever leave having learned anything new.

So far, this season, we've seen the ophthalmologist, orthotist, pediatrician, geneticist/neurodevelopmental pediatrician, and cardiologist. Every appointment was either positive or at the very least boring (which is almost always a good thing for a kiddo with special needs). But our appointment with the cardiologist this morning took the cake. Even with all of the encouraging feedback we've gotten from doctors over the past couple of years, I've never heard anything that stole my breath. But this doctor (who is, as you can imagine, an excellent physician) totally knocked the wind out of me both as Collin's mama and as a writer. He was simply giving us and a medical student his opinion regarding Collin's thickened aortal valve, but what he said was this:

"This is a great patient with a great heart. 
It's a heart that isn't perfectly formed, 
but functions just like it is."

Even as kind and insightful as he is, I don't think he realized the scope and wisdom of what he was saying. But I jumped up and grabbed a pen, knowing that I was hearing a gift - something surprising and beautiful and healing to my own heart.